Thank You, so much, dear Nicole! Reading your comment felt like being covered gently with a warm blanket :) What you share here is everything I could wish and hope my writing offers, so thank you so much for letting me know that it did meet you this way 🤍 It means the world 🙏
Thank you for sharing, Hans! And for taking the time to read 🙏
I find that any ideas we might have about what this no-solid-self could look and feel like fail when the actual experience envelops us. I, myself, cannot describe it because whichever words I choose, they will never be "it". I think that's why it is so confusing when we open up to it, because it feels nothing like what we read about or imagined :) At least, that's how it is for me.
Yes, so very well said. I used to wonder why there is no other way to surrender but suffering, and now I know that sometimes we need to be pressed hard to let go what we thought was best for us so that we can welcome the unimaginable.
Fixation on the ideal of a fixed self... There is plenty here... Mostly, though, I shall summarize the in-stirrings and say that there is deeper grace I must cultivate to transition from shape (self) to shape (self) without my mind feeling left behind uncalibrated (functioning in accord to what has shifted already). I feel community is a central piece to this.
My experience certainly keeps living the mind—or the part of it which identifies with the experience—disoriented and largely uncalibrated over and over. If you find a way to do it otherwise, please let me know! haha :)
I will follow suit, and, also acknowledge my humanity here, haha. I will say though, I navigate the recalibration with less torture due to: wristwatch (grounds my mind into my body), writing (communicates my heart to my mind), piano (communicates my mind to my heart) and talking talking talking to people (given humans reflect parts of ours, including parts of our minds, in talking to others I talk to parts of my mind - comfort them, show them love, embrace them and feel with them).
The rest are the practices [I assume] we share, already. Also, I just accept I am unaware of what I like, unaware of my preferences, unaware of what serves me, unaware of what I must do, unaware of what to ignore, unaware of what to focus on, and so forth. This, then, allows me not to overthink as these change (i.e. I prefer quiet silent open fresh spaces, yet, last week I felt right at home in a coffee shop playing loud afrobeats at night, filled with noise of people...) I just let my heart take me on random adventures that "feel nothing like who I am." This notion that I know nothing, soothes my fixation on defining who I am. Or as I like to say "assume nothing, question everything and learn always."
To illustrate this... This week I've been enjoying feeling a sense of rush. I, by default, reject any and every rush, preferring to take my time, feel ease, peace and slow everything down to a soulful rhythm. Although, this week, the rush has been feeling nourishing, nurturing to my heart and aligned with my depths... This confused me plenty because "it's nothing like me" but, I know nothing, so, I'll just go with it and cherish the rush, because, it's all God, right?! Plus, it matches the energy of spring and summer, I'd guess.
I feel that to return into my body, then return into my heart, I had to disconnect from my mind. Now, I find myself needing to include my mind along the journey as well because, it deserves it :)
Also, I find that my soul, my heart, my body and my mind all possess different values. For example, my heart values depth and reverence, my mind values playfulness and wonder. Hence, I often neglect my mind (playfulness and wonder) in favor of my heart (depth and reverence)... So I must continually weave the distinct values from my mind, body, heart and soul... BTW the piano allows playfulness, wonder and depth together...
In sum, every day, Justyna, I meet a new man, and every day, I must be open to accept that man might be nothing like the man I met yesterday. Easier said than done. But yeah, this is me today, in a week I'll be crying because life will make zero sense yet again, haha.
Thank you for sharing so openly, Chelton! I may not always be able to respond in full, but I really appreciate your presence and reflections. Be well also!
I am both happy and sad to know we are in this together, Kyle. But I believe that while happiness when shared multiplies, for sorrow the opposite is true — when carried by many hands, it is divided and the burden becomes lighter. I hope you do feel at least a tiny bit lighter
Thank you also for mentioning your poem! I've just read it and I love its fierce gentleness :) I agree, what we both shared feels quite similar, and I am glad it is so 🤍
Lovely poem. The photo of that poor butterfly trapped in the web makes me feel sad because they are my favourite creatures. But this is life, isn’t it.. I hope you are feeling better Justyna. 🙏💛
Dear Grace, thank you so much 🤍 I was hesitant when picking this painting but I've decided that, as you write, it is life itself. It also felt fitting for this piece.
And thank you for asking! That's very kind of you :) Yes, I am feeling better and I was told I can go back to trail running and yoga which I'm very excited about!
This piece touched me deeply.
Your words feel like a gentle invitation to pause, breathe, and remember that home can be found in so many quiet, unexpected places.
Thank you for this tender reminder – it’s the kind of writing that stays with me, long after reading.
Thank You, so much, dear Nicole! Reading your comment felt like being covered gently with a warm blanket :) What you share here is everything I could wish and hope my writing offers, so thank you so much for letting me know that it did meet you this way 🤍 It means the world 🙏
dear justyna,
i love "there is no place that isn’t a home"
the poem, the concept, the mantra, the all of it
thank you!
love
myq
Dear Myq,
so glad to hear that! Thank you so much for taking the time to read, for sharing, and for opening your heart 🙏
I keep trying to learn the illusion of a solid self, and being home where I am. Thanks for the beautiful poem and narrative!
Thank you for sharing, Hans! And for taking the time to read 🙏
I find that any ideas we might have about what this no-solid-self could look and feel like fail when the actual experience envelops us. I, myself, cannot describe it because whichever words I choose, they will never be "it". I think that's why it is so confusing when we open up to it, because it feels nothing like what we read about or imagined :) At least, that's how it is for me.
True blessing has revealed itself within you, by gods grace, only when no other option exists will the mind surrender to what is .. home ..
Yes, so very well said. I used to wonder why there is no other way to surrender but suffering, and now I know that sometimes we need to be pressed hard to let go what we thought was best for us so that we can welcome the unimaginable.
Thank you so much for being here and for reading!
Fixation on the ideal of a fixed self... There is plenty here... Mostly, though, I shall summarize the in-stirrings and say that there is deeper grace I must cultivate to transition from shape (self) to shape (self) without my mind feeling left behind uncalibrated (functioning in accord to what has shifted already). I feel community is a central piece to this.
I wish it be so for you, Chelton!
My experience certainly keeps living the mind—or the part of it which identifies with the experience—disoriented and largely uncalibrated over and over. If you find a way to do it otherwise, please let me know! haha :)
I will follow suit, and, also acknowledge my humanity here, haha. I will say though, I navigate the recalibration with less torture due to: wristwatch (grounds my mind into my body), writing (communicates my heart to my mind), piano (communicates my mind to my heart) and talking talking talking to people (given humans reflect parts of ours, including parts of our minds, in talking to others I talk to parts of my mind - comfort them, show them love, embrace them and feel with them).
The rest are the practices [I assume] we share, already. Also, I just accept I am unaware of what I like, unaware of my preferences, unaware of what serves me, unaware of what I must do, unaware of what to ignore, unaware of what to focus on, and so forth. This, then, allows me not to overthink as these change (i.e. I prefer quiet silent open fresh spaces, yet, last week I felt right at home in a coffee shop playing loud afrobeats at night, filled with noise of people...) I just let my heart take me on random adventures that "feel nothing like who I am." This notion that I know nothing, soothes my fixation on defining who I am. Or as I like to say "assume nothing, question everything and learn always."
To illustrate this... This week I've been enjoying feeling a sense of rush. I, by default, reject any and every rush, preferring to take my time, feel ease, peace and slow everything down to a soulful rhythm. Although, this week, the rush has been feeling nourishing, nurturing to my heart and aligned with my depths... This confused me plenty because "it's nothing like me" but, I know nothing, so, I'll just go with it and cherish the rush, because, it's all God, right?! Plus, it matches the energy of spring and summer, I'd guess.
I feel that to return into my body, then return into my heart, I had to disconnect from my mind. Now, I find myself needing to include my mind along the journey as well because, it deserves it :)
Also, I find that my soul, my heart, my body and my mind all possess different values. For example, my heart values depth and reverence, my mind values playfulness and wonder. Hence, I often neglect my mind (playfulness and wonder) in favor of my heart (depth and reverence)... So I must continually weave the distinct values from my mind, body, heart and soul... BTW the piano allows playfulness, wonder and depth together...
In sum, every day, Justyna, I meet a new man, and every day, I must be open to accept that man might be nothing like the man I met yesterday. Easier said than done. But yeah, this is me today, in a week I'll be crying because life will make zero sense yet again, haha.
Be well!
Thank you for sharing so openly, Chelton! I may not always be able to respond in full, but I really appreciate your presence and reflections. Be well also!
It is well, Justyna, I do appreciate your presence in whichever shape or form it may be, aswell. Thank you!
I am with you here, Justyna! Thank you for the encouragement in both prose and poetry.
This feels very like the poem (my very first, ever) that flowed out of me this week. If you care to read it, I posted it in a note on Thurs or Fri.
I am both happy and sad to know we are in this together, Kyle. But I believe that while happiness when shared multiplies, for sorrow the opposite is true — when carried by many hands, it is divided and the burden becomes lighter. I hope you do feel at least a tiny bit lighter
Thank you also for mentioning your poem! I've just read it and I love its fierce gentleness :) I agree, what we both shared feels quite similar, and I am glad it is so 🤍
Lovely poem. The photo of that poor butterfly trapped in the web makes me feel sad because they are my favourite creatures. But this is life, isn’t it.. I hope you are feeling better Justyna. 🙏💛
Dear Grace, thank you so much 🤍 I was hesitant when picking this painting but I've decided that, as you write, it is life itself. It also felt fitting for this piece.
And thank you for asking! That's very kind of you :) Yes, I am feeling better and I was told I can go back to trail running and yoga which I'm very excited about!
That is so good to hear! 🩵
🤍🤍🤍
I so love this! Thank you 😊 ♥️
I'm so glad, Pamela! Thank you so much for reading! 🤍
LOVE this!
So very true.🙏🏼
Thank you, Mariska, for your kind words and for your gift of attention 🙏
You are very welcome.
Ditto.🙏🏼
Very beautiful and coming exactly at the right moment. ❤️
You have a beautiful gift. May more of the world see experience it.🙏🏼